Managed Care at the Highest Level

Three people pass and appear at the gates of Heaven to meet St. Peter. He asks the first one: “How did you live your life?” She answered: “I was a laboratory researcher for a medical branch which looked for cures for various diseases. I worked hard all my life and never squandered my time on earth.”

St. Peter says: “Welcome, my child. You may enter into Heaven!” And he turns to the next person and asks: “How did you live your life?” He answered: “I was a doctor in a wealthy neighborhood but spent half of my time volunteering in local clinics and working for Doctors without borders. I also gave regularly to my house of worship.”

St. Peter says: “Welcome, my child. You may enter into Heaven!” And he turns to the next person and asks: “How did you live your life?” She answers: “Well, I also worked in the medical field. I worked in the billing department of a managed care company and I worked hard to keep costs down and make medical care available to more people. I also attended church regularly.”

St. Peter says: “Welcome, my child. You may enter into Heaven!”

The woman is pleasantly surprised and asks St. Peter: “Now-a-days people don’t much like people in managed care – I’m a little surprised I got into Heaven so easily!”

To which St. Peter answers: “No problem, you have been pre-approved for three days.”